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By Matthew Kimura

First off, this is the first time that I’ve ever seen an episode of a reality show getting this much hype. All week long Spike TV aired ads for not just the series The Ultimate Fighter, but for this specific episode. The soundclips said that viewers would be in store for the best fight ever out of the five seasons, and Pulver was even quoted saying that the third episode would show the world what makes these guys so special. Now if you missed this episode, catch the replay on Tuesday. Seriously.

With that said…

The show started off with a recap of what went down last week. If you missed it, and didn’t read my recap of the last episode (shame on you), Manny overwhelmed Noah. He pushed the pace the entire fight, and made Noah tap with a sick looking kimura. Some guys on Team Penn even noted that Noah didn’t get any offense in whatsoever.

After the loss, BJ Penn seemed pretty frustrated with it all. Losing isn’t fun for anyone, especially for a coach, and especially when the coach beating you is a rival. Penn was worried about Gabe Ruediger’s weight, as he was still very much overweight. If Ruediger got picked to fight, he would be in a tight spot.

Ruediger seemed pretty nonchalant about the whole thing, and then said that he wanted to get a colonic. Now if you don’t know what a colonic is, basically you stick a tube in your butt, and then a doctor flushes your system out with water, ridding your body of the excess fecal matter and toxins that may be weighing you down. Ruediger said that he’d had a colonic done before. It helped him lose weight, and it also made him feel good afterward. He then went on for about a minute with other excuses on how a colonic is a good way to cut weight. Why do I say excuses? There’s a stigma attached to that sort of procedure. I’ll let you think of them…

In my opinion, Ruediger’s a bum, but him coming to the house 20 pounds overweight doesn’t make him one (that just makes him unprepared). It’s the fact that it doesn’t look like he’s doing anything extra outside of training to lose it all. Bobby Southworth, from TUF’s first season, lost 20 pounds in one day. He did his training, and then went to a YMCA and sat in the sauna. No crying or tubes up the butt. Just gritty hard work.

At the house, Manny donned the “Team Pulver Championship Belt”, and looked to be in a better mood from the previous night. Diaz was happy for Manny, and the team being 2-0, but said that he was going nuts because he hadn’t fought yet.

Training Sessions

Team Penn started off their practice sitting around with the coaches questioning everyone’s heart for the fights, but it was mainly aimed at Ruediger. Penn said that if Ruediger were to get a colonic, then he’d have to miss a practice, which was ridiculous. The other coaches agreed, as Coach DeSouza lectured to Ruediger that training hard will get you to where you want to be—not a tube up your butt.

Team Pulver came in a little bit later to train. Watching Corey work makes me want to go to the gym. He looks like he pushes himself to exhaustion in every session, and then pushes that much more. Every time the other guys look tired, he stands up and yells something to fire everyone up. When asked who he wanted to fight, he said that he’d like to take on Ruediger.

Later in the session, Jeremy Horn came in to help train Team Pulver with some groundwork. Diaz seemed pretty excited, as he and his brother, UFC vet Nick Diaz, watched Horn fight. Corey had no idea who he was. That didn’t matter much to Horn, though, because he was really impressed with Corey’s intensity, saying that Corey was like a ball of clay and picked up on everything pretty quickly. At the end of the session, Horn told Corey that since they lived somewhat near each other, in Utah, Horn would train with Corey.

Horn is a really good technical fighter. Corey would be making a huge mistake if he didn’t take him up on the offer.

Elsewhere, Ruediger went off to get a colonic. The doctor that was there to do the procedure seemed very nice, although way too excited for her line of work. Ruediger put the tube in and then farted a lot. The doctor told him that she expected to see a mudslide flow in through the pipes. My god. I can’t believe I just typed that. His facial expressions looked very uncomfortable, and made me very uncomfortable.

Maynard criticized Ruediger for getting it done, and with the same sentiment that Penn and DeSouza shared, with Ruediger having to miss practice and not being willing to work it all off.

Back at the house, some of the guys paraded around in thongs. Rob Emerson wore a thong, a cape and wrestling mask. It creeped Diaz out a good deal.

Fight Announcement

Team Pulver got to choose the fight once again, since Manny’d won the previous fight, and this time there were no words. Diaz stepped out and chose Emerson. They stood nose to nose. Dana White said that he’d been looking forward to seeing Diaz fight because of how his brother, Nick Diaz, fought.

To make it official: Rob Emerson (Team Penn) v. Nate Diaz (Team Pulver)

Emerson (25 years/ 5′8″/ 71″) is from the OC, got into the fight game because one night he went to an underground fighting event. One of the fighters got hurt, so someone asked him to step in. He knocked his opponent out in the first round, and has kept at it ever since. He said that he was ready to hurt someone, and didn’t care much who it was going to be. He’s a great kickboxer and has good takedown/ground defense.

Diaz (21 years/ 6′1″/ 73″) is from California as well, and was raised by a family of fighters. His standup is really good, and could probably put on a clinic if his fight got taken to the ground. Dana White said that Diaz’ biggest attribute is that he fights with absolutely everything in him. It’s such a cliché, but it’s true, and it’s what makes Diaz’ fights exciting.

Before the fight, both guys said that they were ready to rock. Emerson predicted it’d be bloody. He also cut Diaz down saying that he’d fought a lot of punks like Diaz before. Diaz said he didn’t see what was so special about Emerson.

The Fight

ROUND 1

Both guys started out circling, and then exchanged a few leg kicks. Diaz went for the clinch early and landed some knees, and then Emerson backed Diaz into the fence. Diaz went for a takedown, but Emerson let go. They clinched again, and Emerson got some knees in before Diaz got away. Standing up, they exchanged some good punches but nobody got a real advantage. Emerson missed with a sloppy head kick. Diaz went for the takedown, but Rob managed to get out of it and stood back up. Diaz had a good combo before clinching again, backing Emerson into the fence. They let go and Rob missed with another head kick. Then they exchanged some more punches. Diaz finally found an opening to try and take Emerson down, but then the bell rang.

My scorecard: Very close. Both guys pushed the action, and there was not a second of inactivity. Scoring it, either guy could win the first round depending on what day of the week it was. Since it’s Thursday, I’ll say Diaz.

ROUND 2

More punches from both guys. Emerson threw another kick, and clinched. Diaz threw some knees, and then almost got a takedown before throwing some more knees and punches. Then they both punched each other out of the clinch before resetting themselves. At 3:30ish Diaz finally got a takedown and was in Emerson’s guard. They threw punches back and forth, Diaz on top and Emerson on the bottom. Diaz was ready to pass the guard, so Emerson switched to a butterfly guard, but it didn’t last long because Diaz dove on top of him and got mount. He landed some punches before Emerson rolled over and gave up his back (you don’t do that with a BJJ guy like Diaz). From there on, it looked like one of those cartoon fights with the smoke cloud and the occasional fist flying out. Emerson kept rolling on his stomach, then on his back, then on his stomach, and so on. Diaz went for an armbar, then a triangle choke, then another armbar, and then finally made Emerson tap out with a rear naked choke.

Your winner: Nate Diaz via submission by rear naked choke. Team Pulver is now 3-0.

Overall, the first round was too close to call. You couldn’t have asked for better action. In the second round, though, Diaz just outworked Emerson. When the fight went to the ground, you could just tell that it’d be a matter of time before Emerson got caught with a submission. He gutted it out though. With the effort that Emerson gave, he has nothing to be ashamed of.

Just a side note…UFC 70 is on Saturday at 7pm on Spike TV. Catch Mirko “Cro Cop” headkick the living daylights out of Gabriel Gonzaga. Also on the card, Michael Bisping (winner of TUF 3) will most likely annihilate Elvis Sinosec. It should be good. Check your local listings.

Check out The Ultimate Fighter: Season Five every Thursday at 10pm EST on Spike TV.

See you next week!

The Ultimate Fighter: Season Five

Last 5 posts by Matt

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• The Ultimate Fighter Season Five--Episode 9 Recap - May 31st, 2007
• The Ultimate Fighter: Season Five - Episode Seven - May 17th, 2007

Filed under: The Ultimate Fighter